IS MY MARRAIGE DOOMED? (OR AM I JUST CLUELESS!)

It's really a sad thing.  I think everyone has probably figured out the @Angel Harding is my husband/wife.  Although I do believe Angel has divorced me long ago.  I have to tread softly here and just get some of this off my chest.  

As I was working on this next post for the Blog - something has come up and I just needed to post.  So, I am sharing the Google+ activity.

https://plus.google.com/u/0/108645756729229654936

MAKEUP (MINE AND HERS)

     It seems to me I'm venting all the years of not being able to talk to anyone about any of this.  I'm not angry though.  Not at all.  We gotta understand Clark too (or Lois, I would say).  They haven't been able to talk to anyone about all this exciting stuff going on either.  We go out shopping and Lois is making her own choices with her makeup.  I mean, have you SEEN those colors, and lashes, and mascara, and the PENCILS.  OMG - I love all of it and so does Lois.  Us girls just LOVE our makeup.

     We got this thing, always have, (I mean, I got this thing!  Let's be honest here, it is ME) with my makeup pencils.  To narrow it down a wee bit more, the Pencil Sharpener.  

     I love my pencils.  I adore them, I cherish them, they are my artists tools for the canvas I call face.  And the Sharpener...you know what I mean.  I have this Sharpener that I've had for at least 15 years.  It's metal, silver in color, small, and has two holes, one biggie and one for the regular size.  It is My Sharpener.

     When Lois and I first started to do makeup together, I would allow her to use my pencils but not my Sharpener.  I realized, right away, I am overly protective of certain pencils.  I cannot share the pencils. (we won't say the word ((WHISPER) - Sharpener). 

     We worked that out a long time ago.  I got mine, she got hers.  It's all good and still love now.  Lois got a new sharpener last time we shopped for makeup and she bought a cheapie.  I told her so, had to be right in there tellin' her what, when, how (yeah, I know, meow me), she didn't listen and got it anyway.  Within a week the sharpener didn't work anymore.  She asked to borrow mine.  Already!  "No."  I roll my eyes 'cause she already knows not to ask.  She just wants to see my nails so she can copy me.  (??!?)

     I am working on this other thing in me, it's like jealousy or envy, maybe fear.  The fear is covering up something deeper though and I am digging.  I don't want to lose her to this coming out but, the world is such a gorgeous place, it deserves more gorgeous people in it so I will not stop the process.  I been flyin' around all my life, doing my thang with the gorgeous now it's Mariposa, baby, gotta let 'em fly.  I know I kinda feel left out cause Lois is just doin' her thing.  We used to do this together and it used to be underground, like our night-time secret.   I'm still figurin' out what my thing is now.  Like...where do I fit in?  Nope, that will not do for me.  I don't fit in.  I get fitted.  If that makes sense.  I feel very alone around her, alot more than I like to acknowledge.  

Part of my thing is MAKEUP!  Did I mention, I love my pencils.  (sssh - sharpener)

     The next day, we are sitting at the table, putting on our makeup and Lois pulls out a pencil sharpener.  I'm looking across the table, eyes over the top of my glasses, "what is that?", as I point with my eyes to the little thing in her hand.  Lois says, "a pencil sharpener", with this coy little grin.  I see the smile lines in the corners of her lips.  "And...where did you get that?"  "Oh, I asked the gf about how to get my pencils sharpened the right way and she gave me this".  We have a couple that shares our apartment right now (son and gf).    I can feel the fur on the back of my neck start to busstle up (is that how you spell busstle?)  I'm trying to keep my voice steady and calm.  "When did you talk to her?"  (We live in 950 square feet, 2 bedrooms, what the hell am I saying! When????)  Just imagine, I'm spitting out the words, the polish is flying OFF my nails as I'm trying to keep the claws from running any pantyhose, much less, oh who knows what.  Lois just looks over at me and gave me the, to die for, most beautiful eyelash bat I've had from her in a long time.  My heart melts just a tinsy, tiny droplet.  Nope, be strong here, get back to it!  I get up, walk around to the other side of the 2 foot wide table, take the pencil sharpener, proceed to take one of her pencils out of her makeup bag and I sharpen it.

     Damned if the thing don't work just great!  BETTER THAN MINE.  It's PLASTIC, it only sharpens one size!  What is going on here.  Lois has a better pencil sharpener than me!  Huff, Puff, busstle goes down, tail lowered, I surrender.  I don't wanna put on my makeup today anyway.  My skin (no, I) need a day to breath.  

     I'm pouty for awhile as I go through and gather up my most prized pencils, put them in my to go bag with my other makeup essentials, put them in my purse and hide my purse.  My pencil sharpener is in the bottom of the makeup bag in the bottom of the purse in the bottom of the nail box in the back of the closet.  Lois will NEVER find it.  Folks, she don't need my dogon Pencil Sharpener.  She gots hers and I gots mine.  

     Why did I and why do I get so flustered with something so silly?  It's so silly, petty, catty definately and now I am just laughing.  I had to get out of the apartment for awhile so I go see somes friends and I'm telling them my trauma of the day and we are laughing so hard as I pull out the makeup bag from the purse.  I pull out the sharpener and show him.  Mine is all mucked up with lip liner in the small hole cause I didn't clean it.  I'm still going on and on about how much better his sharpener is.  

     I feel stupid and it has seriously been years of me nagging, "don't use my sharpener."  I know she does when I'm not looking though cause you know how that red lip liner is stuck up in there, you don't know and go stick the white pencil in that same hole then put that in the wrong spot, now you got red lip liner on your eyeballs and white lips, what is my life coming to?  

     The icing on the cake is I know, Lois will never, ever use my sharpener again cause now she has the inside scoop on where to get the good ones and they won't be tellin' me 'cause I am just not with the in crowd after how I acted up today with Lois.  

     What's a Cat to do?  She will just get her blanket, go curl up with it, lick the wounds, fix those claws, even shave them down a bit and get cleaned up.  Maybe get a haircut for the busstling fur too.  Yup.  

MAKEUP Tips for a Crossdresser from the Crossdressers Wife i.e. CatWoman:

#1  Have a good pencil sharpener.
#2  Good Q-Tips on hand to clean after every pencil
#3  A bit of skill and finese to blend the colors.
#4  Think OUTSIDE of the lines, yes, lines!  You are a gorgeous work of art, there are no lines you must stay inside.
#5  You will look as good as you feel.  :-)

SHOULD SERIOUSLY BE A CONSIDERATION OF PROFOUND IMPORTANCE TO THE CROSSDRESSER WITH A DEDICATED PARTNER - MAYBE THEY COULD CALL IT A BOUNDARY THEY WILL RESPECT, JUST FOR US GG's! 

MY LAST TIP for today:
Don't touch your wifes make-up, clothes, panties, lingerie, you know the drill.  Even if she tells you it's ok.  Make sure she gets all the thrills and frills you desire and apply to yourself and we make it GORGEOUS!